au.was.here.

here i go again... 2 years after the last one, i am wanting another tattoo. it comes after the heels of incidentally running into the ads for Dutdutan '08 - the annual Philippine tattoo convention. i'm definitely going this year! not really to get myself tattoed but to get me some inked skin photography. but just looking it over made me want a new one, too. i must have already forgotten the pain of the previous one...haha! i've had 3 previous tattoo experiences. the first one was on my upper back, 2nd one was a cover-up job on same spot and the 3rd on my right leg. each and everytime, i swear it off. as soon as the tat heals, i want another. luckily, the sissy in me usually wins and my short attention span keeps the next one at bay until i run across something that makes me yearn strong enough to actually go for it. this time, it's Dutdutan + a design I truly love. i'm planning to put this one on my upper arm.

i wanted an OM or a TAM symbol as my next tattoo. Tam is the seed bija for the deity Tara who i feel the most connection to. however, i didn't know how to draw it properly and how to incorporate it with another element that i wanted in my tattoo: the lotus. i want the lotus because of it's wonderful symbolism; it grows from the mud, rises above it and finally blossoms pure and beautiful. it is also a symbol for enlightenment, a state that every being should aspire for.

i hit on an idea to ask a very good friend of mine, Karma Yeshe (who is probably the only Pinay Tibetan Buddhist nun right now), to help me with the design. Ani Yeshe happens to be a thangka painter so it couldn't be more perfect! i believe we also share a connection so aside from her art expertise, no one could be more perfect to understand and translate what i wanted to have designed.

since i had been planning for some time to join her for yoga class, i took the opportunity to request her to sketch the lotus design and the bijas when we met Thursday last week for the class. i searched on the net for similar designs of the lotus that i liked and showed this to her. after looking them over, Ani Yeshe very quickly nailed the sketches practically to the T as to how i would really want it! i simply tweaked it a bit for color and which bija to put in the center. now i am left with the decision. Om or Tam? black or colored?

as usual, i am getting the jitters now that my schedule to do the tattoo is so close--Thursday. until the very last minute, right up to the point i am already at the tattoo studio, i am usually still making up my mind on whether to go ahead or not. this always happens to me with every tat and every piercing i've tried! hopefully, i don't turn chicken on the day. anyhoo, update will be soon enough. wish me luck!